New In Town
by Wakkowarnerlover
Summary: After being hit by a car, Perry falls into a coma and somehow ends up in the ghost town of Gluum. Unaware of the circumstances that led him there, Perry is trapped until he can figure out what happened to him... and figure out how to wake up before he is stuck in the ghost town for good. THIS STORY IS PART OF A SERIES, SOME THINGS MAY NOT MAKE SENSE W/O READING THE PREVIOUS TALES!
1. Chapter 1

**(Answer to an FAQ for most of my stories: Perry and the boys are able to communicate through translators. The boys created them after remembering the Second Dimension (Refer to my other fanfiction, Jingles). Only Phineas, Ferb, and as of this story, Candace, own the translators. If you're curious, be sure to check out my other fics- they're a series! HAPPY READING!)**

 **(... Serves as a line break)**

 _Ernest the eagle entered the small apartment. "Hello, Brandon. What are you doing this morning?"_

 _"Making breakfast, but we're all out of eggs." Brandon the bulldog said, dumping an entire carton of eggs into the wastebin that matched the kitchen counter._

 _A laughtrack sounded._

 _"By golly, Brandon, what will we eat now?" Ernest said._

 _"Why Ernie, we can always have tomatoes." Brandon said._

 _"Gee whilikers, Brandy! Tomatoes aren't a breakfast food."_

 _The laughtrack sounded again._

 _"Really? Because I just created a new recipe… tomato pancakes!" Brandon flipped a burning pancake onto the floor._

 _The laughtrack sounded._

 _"Oh, Brandy. You and your tomato pancakes." Ernest said._

 _The camera zoomed in on both Brandon and Ernest, and they smiled. The theme song medley began to play._

"Stop snickering, Agent!" Ernest the eagle commanded.

Perry tried to make his expression as blank as possible.

"Honestly, you have no respect." Ernest snapped. "Now, answer me. Why did you NOT show up for role call?"

"Because I was late."

"And why were you late?"

"Because I didn't happen to come into the room until after everyone's name was called today." Perry answered.

The other agents began to laugh.

"STOP JOKING AROUND." Ernest shouted, getting up in Perry's face. "WHY. WERE. YOU. LATE?"

"Because I didn't hear my alarm clock." Perry said.

Ernest shoved him aside and strutted down the hall. "Don't give me attitude EVER again, you hear me?"

"Look who's got attitude now." Perry muttered. He turned the other way.

"Why were you laughing when he was yelling at you?" Devon the dog asked. "I thought he was going to kill you."

"Every time Ernest or Brandon the bulldog yells at me, I imagine them together in one of those old sitcoms."

"That's not a good response to have when someone yells at you." Pinky the Chihuahua said.

"Yeah. I know. I should probably have a black eye or something. But it all worked out. Sorta."

"Kinda sorta maybe." Devon said. "Although I doubt Ernest is going to be friendlier toward you."

 **...**

"Hi, Perry!" Phineas said. "You're just in time. We're watching baby videos of ourselves."

Perry hopped onto Phineas's bed and stared at the projector. Baby Phineas was crawling around on the ground.

"Aww, you're so cute." Perry said.

"Look at baby me coming up in a second." Ferb said.

The video switched to baby Ferb sitting in a high chair, holding a bottle of glue.

"Oh, is baby Fwankie making a wittle art pwoject?" Cooed a voice.

"That was my babysitter Peggy." Ferb said. "I never saw her again after that video."

"Ooh, how adowabwe." Peggy said. "Smile for the camera, wittle Fwankie!"

"Did she have issues pronouncing R's?" Perry asked.

"Apparently. And she also had to stick 'ie' after every single K she said." Ferb said. "Blankie, binkie, Frankie…"

"Blank, bink, Frank." Perry said.

"Okay, so maybe like two of those words actually needed it." Ferb said. "But still."

Baby Ferb looked toward the camera and aimed the glue. A shriek sounded. The video turned completely black.

"Father told her not to give me glue, but she didn't listen." Ferb said.

"Aww, look, here's me again!" Phineas said. "Digging a hole."

Baby Phineas had indeed dug quite a large hole in the backyard.

"Are all babies destructive?" Perry asked.

"Destructive?" Phineas asked. "I was just looking for dinosaurs."

"And this is the video of when Phineas and I first met each other." Ferb said.

"Ferb." Said Little Phineas, pointing at little Ferb.

"I forgot I named you that." Phineas said.

"Everyone did." Ferb said with a shrug. "Even father."

"I wonder if Peggy remembers." Perry said. "Or if she'll start calling you Wittle Fewbie."

"Ferb is the best name." Phineas said. "No one else has it. It's funny to think of the names you were almost named sometimes. Like, Isabella told me her mom almost named her Veronica. Doesn't have the same ring to it, does it?"

"And we almost named you Bartholomew." Ferb told Perry.

"I remember." Perry said.

"If I have a kid, I'm going to name him Ferb." Phineas said. "After you, Ferb."

"You'd name someone after someone you named?" Perry asked.

"What if it's a girl?" Ferb asked.

"Then her name will be Ferbette."

"If I have a kid, its name will be Mr. Baby." Ferb said.

"What about when it gets older?" Perry asked.

"Mr. Child." Ferb said. "Then Mr. Teenager, Mr. Adult, Mr. Old Guy, and Mr. Skeleton."

"What if it's a girl?" Phineas asked.

"Mr. Baby." Ferb insisted. "Oh dear, we were so preoccupied with talking that we missed the entire baby video of my birth. I'll go back."

"NO, NO." Perry said. "No, really, Ferb, it's fine. I can live without the image of your birth in my head."

Ferb grinned. "Just kidding."

"You scared me for a second there." Perry said.

 **...**

"It's getting late." Perry said. "We should probably go in."

"Look, there's Venus!" Phineas said.

"Are you sure you didn't superglue your eye to that telescope? Come on, Phinny. It's cold outside."

"Come on, Perry. It's a perfect night for stargazing. Look, Ferb. Look at Venus."

Ferb took a look inside the telescope. "That's an airplane, Phineas."

"No, it's…" Phineas took another look and chuckled. "Oh. It is an airplane. My bad."

"Your vision's starting to fog up from looking through that thing." Perry said.

"There's Mars!" Phineas said. "Candace was queen there once."

"And what a queen she was." Ferb said.

Perry stood up and carefully walked over to Phineas on all fours. He was trained to climb roofs, but he still didn't want to take any chances.

"It is very pretty out here at night." He said.

"I like looking at the stars." Phineas said. "It makes me feel safe. Like, I know they'll always be out there and they'll never leave."

"All stars die, actually." Ferb said. "After a long time."

Phineas frowned and looked through the telescope again. "I don't want to think that. I want to know they'll always be there."

"Well, you two are pretty good at defying the laws of the universe." Perry said. "I'm sure you could make that happen."

"At least I know you and Perry will never leave." Phineas said. "You'll always be my brother, Ferb. And Perry will always be our platypus."

"That's true." Perry smiled. "Forever and always. No matter what."

 **...**

"It's a good thing I installed this art room." Monogram said proudly to Carl. "Now the agents can be creative."

"I made a rock." Perry said to Devon, holding up a clay ball.

"I made a bigger rock." Said Peter the panda.

Kyle the kangaroo mashed some clay into a long rod and stuck it on his head. "I don't get the appeal."

"Well, it's kinda fun." Perry said. "I made a handprint."

"Let's make a giant clay ball." Peter said. "Everyone put all their clay together."

All of the agents mashed their clay together. The ball was about the size of Perry.

"Now we have to put it in the oven so it will be a sculpture." Said Kenny the koala.

Everyone helped to lift the ball into the clay oven. They shut the door.

"Look at them, Carl." Monogram said, beaming. "They're making a project all together."

"Uh, sir? Is the oven meant to hold that much-"

Perry was blown back as a loud bang sounded. The fire alarms began beeping.

"Well, there goes the new art room." Perry said, wiping the black dust from his fur.

"THIS, AGENTS." Monogram yelled. "THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE ANYTHING NICE! CARL, GET A BROOM."

Perry stood up and brushed himself off. "That was an interesting experience. I hope Monogram doesn't ban us from using clay ever again."

"I was going to make a clay panda sculpture for the Save The Pandas campaign." Peter said.

"Peter, with all the campaigning you've been doing, those pandas are probably living in huge golden penthouses." Perry said. "With six indoor heated pools, twelve king-sized beds with satin sheets and a whole truckload of bamboo."

"A truckload of bamboo isn't going to feed a lot of pandas for very long." Peter said. "I need more donations."

"Wait… so they ARE living in golden penthouses?"

"I have been helping this organization for five years." Peter said with a shrug. "I mean, it's added up over the years."

"Thousands of pandas have luxury designer homes and you can't even give me anything more than a stick of bamboo for my birthday?!" Perry demanded.

"Don't worry, Perry. Maybe later on I'll start a Save The Platypuses campaign." Peter said.


	2. Chapter 2

"Phineas opens up the box of spare mechanical parts." Ferb said.

"You're right, Ferb." Said Phineas. "Life is so much more fun with narration."

"Phineas takes an old magnifying glass out of the box." Ferb said.

"So, what are you two doing today?" Perry asked.

"Perry inquires as to what we will do today." Ferb said.

"Oh, we don't know yet." Phineas said.

"Phineas replies that he is unsure as he pushes a lock of hair away from his face." Ferb said.

Phineas's eyebrows drew closer together in concentration. "Perhaps we could use this hourglass and this compass to make some kind of super-clock-directional-system…"

"Phineas begins to…"

"All right, Ferb. That's good." Phineas said.

"Well, I can't wait to see it." Perry said.

"You can see it when you get back from the agency!" Phineas said. "We'll probably have figured it all out by then."

"Sounds good." Perry said.

He placed his paw on the tree trunk. His entrance opened up.

Phineas turned. "Perry… do you… _have_ to leave?"

"Yes." Perry said. "I'll be back in the afternoon or late evening. As always."

"Can't you take a break today?"

"Evil never rests. Is something wrong, Phin?"

"…I don't want you to go." Phineas said. "I just really want you to stay home today. I mean, I always miss you, but… today…"

"Phinny, I'm so sorry. I can't stay. I'll see you later."

Perry gave both the boys a hug and disappeared into the tree trunk.

Phineas sighed and continued digging around in the box, trying to ignore the tense feeling in his chest.

"We may want to build our project inside today." Ferb said, looking at his phone. "The weather forecast says it's going to rain extra hard today."

Rain poured down from the sky. Lightning slashed through the dark clouds.

In a matter of seconds, Phineas was drenched.

"Aw, Ferb. I told you to wait until we got inside to read the weather forecast."

"Phineas disapproves of Ferb's fancy forecast reading." Ferb said.

"Oh, be quiet." Phineas said.

 **...**

"I hate this weather." Perry snapped. "It makes me cranky. And I hate having to wait for my briefing. Can't I just get my mission over with? I need to get back to the boys…"

He was sitting between Pinky and Devon. They were annoyingly cheerful.

"Look, Perry." Pinky whipped out a book. "The O.W.C.A photobook has come out. And there you are."

"I don't want to see my photo." Perry said. "But thanks."

"You're the only one in the whole book not smiling." Devon said.

"Smiling is a waste of face muscles."

"Aw, cheer up, Perry." Pinky said. "The rain will stop soon."

"Even Brandon the bulldog is smiling in his photo." Devon commented.

"I don't care if Darth What's-His-Face smiled for his photo. It's my photo and I can scowl if I want to."

"He has a point." Pinky said.

"Agent P!" Ernest called.

Perry glowered. "This day's about to get a whole lot better." He stood up and walked over to Ernest.

"Salute." Ernest commanded.

Perry did.

"I've called you here to collect that fifty-dollar fine."

"What fine?"

"The fine for not following orders on a filling-in-for-a-comrade mission, which can be avoided if the agent displays exceptional bravery and intelligence. Which you did not."

"What mission?" Perry asked, his patience quickly degrading.

"The Possum Mission." Ernest said.

Perry glared at him. "That went fine. I got everyone out unscathed."

"Your orders were, and I repeat: Return the possum prisoners to the agency safely and arrest Dr. Bloodpudding."

"He got away. Not my fault. Anyway, the possums got back safe."

"Stop. Arguing. With me." Ernest said sternly.

Perry felt his cheeks turn red. "I'm not ARGUING, Ernest. I'm explaining what happened."

He tried to tune in to the Ernest and Brandon sitcom, but he was too angry to think straight. He then attempted to remember the time when Ernest had helped him hide from the police… Ernest had been so kind to him, and he had been wearing some Beluga Whale T-Shirt…

"If you don't want to get fined, then perhaps you should consider showing me a little more respect." Ernest hissed.

"Oh, this is about me laughing a while back. Just because YOU have to be serious all the time, doesn't mean I-"

"SILENCE!"

"I'm tired of this!" Perry spat. "I'm tired of you getting on me about every little thing! I KNOW you're a nice guy, Ernest. I've seen you BE a nice guy."

"SILENCE!"

"YOU'RE NOT EVEN LISTENING TO ME!"

"Raise your voice ONE MORE TIME with me-"

"AND WHAT? The pressure will get too high and your head will pop off? Go ahead, flittering eagle. See if I care."

The agents sucked in their breath.

Ernest's eyes were fixed on Perry.

He handed him a few coins.

"Iced coffee with sugar. Consider our debt settled."

"I am NOT buying you coffee. I'm not your SERVANT-"

"Consider it SETTLED, Agent." Ernest turned and strode out of the room.

The agents all stared at Perry.

"Don't you guys have work to do or something?" Perry grumbled.

It was one thing to have Ernest squash your pride. It was another to have it squashed in front of all the agents.

 **...**

Perry sat down at the table by the window and watched the rain dribble down the sides of the glass.

"I haven't seen you here in a long time." Said a familiar voice.

Perry looked up wearily. A moose held out a menu to him.

"Hey, Morey." Perry said.

"You used to come here all the time." Morey said. "It's great to see you again."  
"Yeah…" Perry sighed. "Missed the food."

"Had a hard day?"

"More like a giant pile of really sucky events, one after the other. But I figure this will help. Coming here, having my favorite food, and heading back home… tomorrow will be better." He smiled.

"Good attitude." Morey said. "What'll it be?"

"Plain bagel, toasted, cream cheese, frozen hot chocolate."

"Would you like that hot chocolate on the bagel and the cream cheese toasted?"

Perry grinned. "You haven't changed a bit, Morey."

Morey winked at him and headed behind the counter.

Perry looked out the window again, feeling a bit more optimistic.

It wasn't so bad. Even with the crummy weather and Ernest forcing him to buy him a coffee. His mission was a success, he was at his favorite café, and he'd get to go home and be with the boys again.

And he had a day off tomorrow. That was another thing to look forward to.

"Worried about those roads." Morey said, setting Perry's hot chocolate down on the table. "Cars could slide out of control if they aren't careful." He sat down across from him. "Kind of a slow day, and your bagel's toasting. Where've you been these past few years?"

"Working, you know." Perry said. "Sorry I didn't come. I just… I kind of hit a hard patch a few years back, and I didn't really want to talk to anyone… so I stopped coming."

Morey nodded. "I figured it was because of that. I heard. He was one of my best customers, too."

Perry sipped his drink.

"I won't talk about it." Morey said. "I see it still bothers you."

"Yeah… I mean, I know Terrence is happy now. But…"

"It's hard." Morey said. "Anyway. Enough about that if you've had enough. How are those boys of yours? Their names slipped my mind for the moment… Phil and… I know the other one had an odd name."

"Phineas and Ferb." Perry said. "And they're doing well."

"Ferb? The same Ferb as in Ferbmail?"

"Their creation." Perry said proudly.

"Ferbmail is a whole new experience in emailing." Morey said. "I swear, I love it to no end. They created that?"

"They create lots of things." Perry said. "They've built a rollercoaster, a portal to Mars, a spaceship…"

Morey shook his head. "How old?"

"Almost twelve."

"You pulling my leg?"

Perry pulled out his phone and showed Morey a photo of the rollercoaster. "No way. I'm serious."

 **...**

Thunder crashed, and Ferb woke up, his heart pounding.

"…Ferb?"

Phineas was probably talking in his sleep again. Ferb rolled onto his side and tried to fall back asleep.

"Ferb?"

Ferb sat up and looked over at Phineas. Phineas's hands were shaking. He looked as though he were about to cry.

"I… something's wrong… something's really wrong…"

Ferb knew. He knew because he had a tight feeling in his stomach, as though he were on a rollercoaster with a huge drop.

Ferb got out of bed and put his arm around Phineas.

"Something's wrong…" Phineas kept saying.

"I know." Ferb said.

They held onto each other. The rain pelted against the window.

 **...**

Perry stood on the sidewalk, waiting for the walk light to go on so he could cross the street. The rain dripped down his fur.

The food and the talk he had had with Morey made him feel considerably better. As soon as he got home and dried off, he'd be perfectly happy.

Who cared about Ernest, anyway?

Perry watched the people walking around, some with umbrellas, some running with magazines over their heads.

Everything always looked so different in the nighttime.

A deafening noise came out of nowhere. Then light, bright, painful light. Perry collapsed to the ground.

He heard people scream. He saw people crowding around him.

A wonderful feeling spread through him. He was happy. He felt completely calm and relaxed. Why did these people look so freaked out?

He closed his eyes.

When he opened them again, he was sitting upside-down on a couch. A television in front of the couch was paused in the middle of rolling the credits.

"Hello, Kevin." Said a zebra sitting next to him. "Lovely weather?"

Perry shut his eyes again.

Now he was looking up at someone. Someone was holding him. Perry wasn't sure he knew the person.

"Don't worry." The person said. "We contacted Carl. Do you know Carl?"

Perry didn't bother to respond. He was too comfy.

"Carl will be here soon." The person said.

Perry closed his eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

Perry woke up again in a bed.

The temperature was perfect. A ceiling fan directly above the bed was giving him a nice, cool breeze. The mattress was perfect, not too stiff or so soft that he sunk into it. The sheets were soft and thin.

He had never been more comfortable in his life.

The scent of the room he was in was also perfect. It smelled like his father's house, if Linda were in it cooking her famous chocolate chip cookies.

The room looked old, but it had nice furnishings. Perry could see a doorway across from his bed leading to another room.

He had no desire to use it. He was perfectly happy to sit in bed.

 _Where am I?_

The instant the thought occurred to him, Perry sat up. He looked cautiously around the room and noticed, for the first time, that a warm dish of pasta was sitting on a small wooden desk next to the doorway, next to a full glass of milk.

Who had brought him here?

Slowly, Perry got out of bed. The carpet wasn't that great. It was thin and hard, more like a cheap rug than anything else. The walls were peeling, and the ceiling looked as though it would collapse at any moment.

A knock sounded in the distance. Perry used the doorway and found himself in a small room that smelled of old books. There was a bookshelf behind a comfortable-looking couch.

The shelf was filled with his favorite books.

Confused, Perry touched the shelf gently. Was he dreaming? Hallucinating?

What had happened to him back on that street corner?

The knock sounded again. Perry headed into the next room.

This one was empty, with the same cheap carpeting, comforting smell, and cracking walls. A door that looked like it was going to come off its hinges was at the front of the room.

Perry opened the door. A man was standing there, a large smile on his face. He was holding a pan covered in tin foil, and he was dressed in a top hat and spats.

"…Uh…" Perry wasn't sure if it was right to say "How can I help you" if he had no idea where he was or how he got here.

"Oh, I'm sorry." The man said. "You must be confused. I should come back later- wait a minute, we've met."

"…We have?" The man did look sort of familiar. Perry couldn't remember where he last saw him.

The man held out the pan. "George Johnson Robert Milton Brown. But you can call me Mr. Brown. Here, I brought homemade brownies. I suppose we'll be neighbors from now on."

"…Neighbors? I… sir, there's been a mistake. You see, I think I may be hallucinating. I was in Danville a second ago, and then there was this zebra, and then some guy… and then I woke up here. And the fact that you understand what I'm saying… and you're human… yeah, I'm crazy. I should go back to bed. Did you see anyone bring me here?"

"Ah." Mr. Brown said sadly. "So… you don't know. I shouldn't have come. I should have waited."

"Can it, Mr. Brownie. What've I told you about greeting the newbies before I've explained everything to them? You're gonna confuse their brains out." A dog said, shoving the man aside. His eyes narrowed when he saw Perry. "You again?"

"…I…" Perry frowned. "…Daly? Daly, why…"

"Normally, I'd just say welcome, new guy." Daly said. "But in your case… welcome back to Gluum."

 **...**

"Am I…" Perry asked. He couldn't get the words out. "I… am…"

"No, you're not dead." Daly said, looking slightly annoyed. "I'd know if you were. But I'd say you're in some bad shape if you managed to build a house here. Not dead, though. This is the second time you've managed to come down here while still tied to the real world. You must have some strong connections."

"So… I'm alive? You're sure?"

"I'm sure."

"What happened?"

"You tell me." Daly shrugged.

"I was standing on this street corner… it was raining… and then I heard this loud noise, and there was this bright light…"

"Hm." Daly said.

"How do I get back up?" Perry asked.

"Depends." Daly said. "You only get back up if you force yourself into consciousness. Which is difficult. Your soul needs to connect to your brain, and right now, that's like attempting to yell hello to someone in Australia while you're living in New York."

"How do I force myself?"

"Depends, like I said. You either figure out what's wrong with you and work from there, or wait until you get back up."

Perry sighed and sat down on the floor.

"Hey, it's not so bad." Daly said. "How did you find your home? Well, it's home for as long as you spend time here. Comfy? Food's to your taste?"

"Yeah." Perry admitted.  
"Should be." Daly said proudly. "Gluum homes try to fit to the comfort of their owners."

"I'll just put these in here and be on my way." Mr. Brownie said, putting the tray inside the house. Perry had forgotten he was there.

"Anyway, no use moping." Daly said. "Get out and meet some of your neighbors. You'll find everyone's pretty nice around here. And of course, your friend's here."

Perry smiled a little. Knowing he was going to see Terrence again almost made him feel better.

But he wanted to know that he was going to see the boys again.

 **...**

"Checkmate." Peter said.

"Peter, I told you. You don't say that until you capture my king." Kyle said.

"Oh." Peter picked up the king.

"You have to MOVE there, Peter. With the chess pieces."

"Let's play Candyland. I'm better at that." Peter said.

"QUIET, Agents." Ernest snapped from the red armchair in the corner of the room. "I'm reading."

Lightning flashed outside, and Carrie the cat sped across the room to hide under the piano bench.

"Come to think of it, why do we have a piano bench?" Kyle asked. "We don't even have a piano."

Peter shrugged.

"Carl!" Monogram called, coming into the room. "Have any of you agents seen Carl? His phone's been ringing."

Peter and Kyle shrugged.

Pinky, Darren and Devon shook their heads.

Carrie poked her paw out from under the piano bench to give Monogram a thumbs-down sign.

"You're a great help." Monogram mumbled.

"Here I am, sir!" Carl said, running into the room.

"Thank goodness. If I have to listen to 'That's Wings, You Turkey' one more time…"

"It was the cheapest ringtone available, sir. I didn't have much cash after the incident we had with the new recruits and the couch…"

The agency phone began to ring. Monogram sighed and picked it up.

"O.W.C.A Headquarters Speaking. Unless you have evil intentions, then this is NOT the O.W.C.A Headquarters and what would you like on your pizza?"

Monogram listened.

"I made up Epic Chess!" Peter said, knocking Kyle's king out of the way.

"Shh!" Pinky whispered. Monogram's facial expression was disconcerting.

"….Okay… where is he now? Is he all right? …Yes, I understand. Thank you. I'll be right there." Monogram hung up and looked at Carl. "There was an accident. Agent P was hit by a car."

The agents all gasped.

"What happened?" Carl asked.

"Apparently the man in the truck lost control of his steering wheel. It's bad. He's been rushed into emergency surgery. They've been trying to contact us for an hour now. We have to get to the hospital."

"I'll get the van pulled up right away, sir." Carl said nervously.

Carrie had partially emerged from under the piano bench, looking upset. Even Ernest looked worried.

Carl brought the van over to the front doors. Monogram pocketed his keys and quickly made his way to the exit.

Ernest, Pinky and Devon followed.

"No." Monogram said sternly. "You three stay here."

 **...**

"How dare they make us wait, Carl?"

"Well, to be fair, sir-"

"Shut up, Carl!"

Carl sighed. The Major was impossible when he was worried.

A man in a white coat holding a clipboard came up to them. "Are you Major Francis Monogram?"

"Yes." Monogram said, hurriedly standing.

"I just came to let you know Perry's out of surgery."

"Will he be okay?" Monogram asked.

"We can't tell at this point. Once he's in a stable state we'll be able to figure out how best to help him."

Monogram sat down, looking devastated.

"I'm sorry, sir." The man said. "Remain hopeful. He survived the surgery, which is usually the hardest part. I'll let you know when I get more news."

The man left.

Monogram let out a shaky breath. "I can't lose him, Carl. Not now."

"It'll be okay, sir." Carl said. "Agent P's really tough."

"Dad?"

Carl narrowed his eyes. He knew that voice. He hated that voice.

"Son!" Monogram pulled Monty into a hug. "Son, you came."

"I only got your text a few minutes ago. What happened? Is Agent P okay?" Monty asked.

"It's awful." Monogram said. "They don't know if he'll make it."

Monty sucked in his breath. "Oh no. …I'll go ask the woman at the front if she knows what's going on now."

Carl wished he had suggested it first. Monogram beamed at Monty.

"Thanks… son."

"It'll be all right." Carl supplied.

"Be quiet, Carl. Can't you see I'm upset?"

 **...**

"Perry!"

Perry turned around. Terrence ran up to him. "Perry, what are you doing back here?"

Perry grinned, his problems fading away at the sight of his old friend.

"Come here." Terrence said, grabbing him in a hug.

Perry felt happiness spreading through him. It had been so long since he'd felt those feathers against his fur, so long since those strong wings had patted him on the back…

"I… we're not going through each other."

Terrence stopped. He backed up. "You're right."

"Usually we can't touch each other." Perry began to worry again. "Do… you think it means…"

Terrence studied him for a long while and shook his head. "You're not dead, Perry. You'd be completely solid-looking to me if you were. You're still transparent."

"Good." Perry said. "I mean… I'm glad we can finally hug each other. And shake hands. It's been so long."

"Too long." Terrence agreed, putting a wing on his shoulder. Perry smiled.

"Anyway." Terrence said. "What happened, Per? How'd you get down here?"

Perry sighed. "That's what I'm trying to figure out."


	4. Chapter 4

"He looks so small and helpless." Monogram said sadly.

Monty had to agree.

He loved Agent P. He had known him since Monogram first brought him to the agency as a baby platypus.

And seeing him now, lying unconscious on a hospital bed, covered in bruises, stitches and bandages, broke Monty's heart.

"When did they say he'd wake up?" Monty asked.

"They don't know. He's in a coma." Monogram sighed. "Could be a few days. Could be a few weeks. Might even…" He swallowed and didn't continue, but Monty didn't have to be a mind reader to figure out what his father was thinking.

 _Not wake up at all._

"He'll be okay, dad." Monty said, more to convince himself than Monogram. "He's strong. He'll get better."

Monogram lightly touched Perry's face in an area where there were no bruises. Then he stood.

"I have to make some calls. I hate to leave him, but they were probably going to come in and kick me out anyway. The visiting hours here suck. They say we need to give him a chance to rest. As if THAT'S going to be a problem."

 **...**

"Do all the houses look like this?" Perry asked, gesturing towards his own temporary home.

"Beat-up and falling apart? Yes." Terrence said. "Daly likes it that way."

"Kind of depressing." Perry said. "Do you think he'd mind if I…"

"No, people can do whatever they want with their homes. Regina Lynde blew hers up. Now she lives under that tree over there."

Terrence pointed at a girl reading a book under a tree. She waved at them.

"Strange but odd." Perry said. "I mean, I'm no good at painting, but I feel like if I got some greenery around there… it'd cheer me up."

"It's so good to see you." Terrence said. "Do you want to come to my place for dinner tonight? Around seven? I have some things to do in a few minutes. I wish I could show you around more… but at least then we could really talk and catch up."

"Sounds good."

"Why don't you get to know your neighbors in the meantime?" Terrence suggested. He headed down the dirt path to Downtown Gluum.

Perry raised an eyebrow. "I'm anti-social, remember?"

"You weren't always." Terrence called back.

Perry watched Terrence disappear. He sat down in front of his house and sighed.

"How are you settling in?" Mr. Brownie asked suddenly, making Perry jump.

"Uh… fine." Perry said, turning around to face him. "Fine."

"I remember when I first came to Gluum." Mr. Brownie said. "I was twenty-three years old… well, I guess I still am. Funny, isn't it? I was up in New York…"

Perry began to make a list in his head of all of the people he would rather talk to than Mr. Brownie at that moment.

"And I said to myself, George Brown, how did you ever manage to get hit by a parade float? But I did, and I was here-"

"If whatever got me here didn't kill me, I'll surely die of boredom." Perry muttered.

"Hm?" Mr. Brownie asked. "Did you say something?"

"No." Perry said. "Just… do you know where I could get flowers to put in those empty pots in front of my house?"

"Flowers." Mr. Brownie thought a moment. "Dead flowers sometimes end up in Gluum. Like animals and humans, they look just as beautiful as in life. You used to see them everywhere. But Willow's started hoarding them. Her home is basically a flower shop, but it's quite difficult to buy flowers from her, you see."  
"Great. Where do I go?"

"Downtown Gluum. Broken-down store."

"More specific."

"Building seventeen."

"Thanks."

Perry high-tailed it down the dirt road before Mr. Brownie could remember he was telling him his life story. Many ghosts kept trying to talk to him. Perry dodged them best he could.

He didn't really like Gluum's atmosphere. Everything looked dark and dead, which he guessed was to be expected, but he didn't see why people couldn't just nail their buildings back together, apply some colorful paints, and maybe plant a few grass seeds in the mud and see if they could get a lawn going.

Perry finally found the store. A large 17 was stenciled on the side. Rickety wooden stairs led to a door.

Perry carefully scaled the steps and opened the door. The inside of the store was much nicer than the outside. It smelled wonderful. Pots of flowers were everywhere: On tables, on shelves, and even on little footstools.

A platypus was sitting in the only armchair not occupied by flowers. She appeared to be scribbling something on a notepad.

"Did I come at a bad time?" Perry asked.

The platypus looked toward the wall adjacent from her. Her eyes frightened him. The pupils were white-blue, and they appeared to cave in to the white area, like an empty abyss. He could find no emotion in them.

"What?" She demanded. "Spit it out."

"Flowers." Perry said, annoyed with her tone of voice. "But seeing as you don't have any, I guess I came to the wrong place. You're Willow, right?"

"Yes." Willow said. She stood up and moved to where she was nearer to him. "Flowers for what?"  
"An interpretive dance. No, because my house is depressing. I want to put flowers around it to lighten it up."

"You're not from here." Willow commented. She had chosen a spot above his head to focus her possessed eyes on. Perry didn't know whether to be offended or relieved. Her less-than-friendly tone took a sarcastic turn. "So, I guess having flowers'll be easy. You won't have to water them here."

"I'd water them." Perry said. "We get food here, and we don't need it. I haven't been hungry at all. Why shouldn't a plant still get water if we still get food?"

Willow's eye twitched slightly, but Perry couldn't tell what she was thinking. The empty pupils gave him no hint.

"What kind do you want?"  
"I don't know. They all look pretty."

Willow reached over and touched the nearest flowerpot. She fondly stroked the petals of the flowers inside.

"Tulips. Usually cheer up people. Perhaps because their shape is so unique, like most flowers before they bloom."

"Great, I'll take them. How much?"

"Just all the care you can give them." Willow said. She handed the pot to Perry. "You're smart, I guess. First person who's cared enough to water them. What did you say your name was?"

"Perry."

"Hm." Willow said. She made her way back to the armchair and sat down. "Good luck with your garden."

"Thanks." Perry said. He turned and left the store.

 **...**

"Here you go, Perry the platypus." Doofenshmirtz said. He placed a giant stuffed teddy bear on the shelf next to Perry's bed. "I made it using my teddybearinator. Great story. I'll have to tell you when you wake up."

He looked back at Perry, who was still sleeping soundly. It annoyed Doofenshmirtz, not knowing whether Perry could hear him or not. He didn't want to waste his breath. But he couldn't help himself.

"I also brought chocolates. The kind without fruit inside, 'cause I know you hate those. Remember that time when you ate one of the ones Vanessa sent me for father's day, and you spit it out on my rug? Good times, Perry the platypus. Good times. I hope they don't go bad before you wake up, because then you'll think I sent you rotting chocolates. Don't think bad of me if you accidentally eat a rotten chocolate because you didn't bother to wake up until after they expired. Or would those be stale chocolates? Oh, and here's a card I bought you. I was surprised they had Scientist to Nemesis 'get well' cards. Very specific. And Vanessa sent you some flowers. For some reason, they say 'To Monty' on the tag. Is it like a nickname or something? Do you have a weird nickname, Perry the platypus? Or is it more like your real name and Monty's just a typo? You know Monty's short for Montgomery? Such a weird name. If you say it a bunch of times, it doesn't sound like a word."

Silence.

Doofenshmirtz sighed. He was used to talking to Perry and receiving no response, but it just seemed lonelier this time.

 **...**

"Honey, I wish you'd just tell me what happened." Linda said.

"I told you." Phineas said. "I fell off Gregory the elephant in our robotic elephant race."

"He's telling the truth, mom!" Candace said. "They had a robot elephant race in the backyard!"

"And Django won." Ferb said. "Phineas would have come in second if he hadn't hit a tree branch and fallen off."

"Are you planning on breaking a limb before every single summer?" Candace demanded. "Last year it was your knee, this year, your arm…"

Linda pulled the car into the driveway and turned around. "Phineas, honey. Really. What happened?"

"I fell off the elephant!" Phineas said.

"Oookay." Linda said. "If you don't want to tell me, you don't have to. Just be more careful."

"You see?" Candace shouted. "You see what your stupid inventions are doing to you?"

"It wasn't Gregory!" Phineas protested. "I wasn't looking and hit a branch. I had my helmet on. I was safe."

Candace pointed at his cast. "Sure, REAL SAFE."

"Hello, there!" Lawrence said, coming out of the house. "How was the hospital, then?"

"Good." Ferb said, helping Phineas out of the car.

"Have you seen Perry, dad?" Phineas asked.

"Not today, Phin. I expect he's out doing what platypuses do."

Phineas sighed.

"He'll come back." Ferb patted his brother. "He always does."

 **...**

Perry knocked on Terrence's shabby door.

"Come on in. It's open." Terrence said.

Perry opened the door. Terrence had cleared his coffee table of the memory objects he had had there when Perry last visited. Now a large pot of spaghetti and a salad sat there.

"I don't cook that well." Terrence admitted.

"I just like making stuff you can pop into the microwave." Perry said. "But thanks, Ter. This looks awesome." He sat down in a chair.

"So good to see you again." Terrence said happily. "Things just aren't as fun without my best friend."

"Yeah." Perry said. "Same. …Sorry, I mean, not much has happened since I last saw you. There isn't really anything for me to tell you right now. Except… well, did I tell you my new method to stop Ernest from bugging me?"

Terrence laughed. "No. I think I would have remembered that."

The conversation went on for a while before turning to Gluum.

"How do you like it here?" Terrence asked.

"Well…" Perry looked around. "Uh… did I tell you how good this spaghetti is?"

"You don't like it here, huh?"

"Not really." Perry said. "So dreary. I miss the boys. My family. Doofenshmirtz. But you like it here…"

"I don't like the atmosphere." Terrence said. "But I love the townspeople. Arthur, Mr. Brownie, Minnie…"

"Regina Lynde?"

"Well, she's strange." Terrence said. "But everyone else is great. You should get to know them."

"I'm more of an aloof kind of guy. I'm just gonna try and get back up to the surface as soon as I can."

Terrence smiled sadly. "You've changed."

"No." Perry said. "I've always waited to get to know people before I feel comfortable around them. I only made friends with you instantly because I was a baby."

"You used to be so happy." Terrence said.

"I still am. I have everything I could ever want. People I love being around."

 _Except you._ He added silently. _You chose this stupid, depressing town over being with me again._

"I understand if you don't like it here." Terrence said. "But- don't take offense at this- I'm happy you came. Even if just for a little while. I missed you."

"I missed you, too." Perry said. "A lot."


	5. Chapter 5

Ferb was standing on a rock, overlooking a giant chasm.

Sure, there were safer places to stand. But for whatever reason, Ferb had chosen the rock.

He was just about to eat from the giant bowl of ice cream that had appeared next to him when the rock began to shake.

"Ferb! Ferb!" The rock said.

Ferb opened his eyes. Phineas was shaking him. "Ferb, wake up!"

Ferb blinked.

"I had a dream, Ferb."

"So did I."

"What was it?"

"I don't know." Ferb said testily. "I didn't get far enough in it."

"It was about Perry, Ferb." Phineas said. "I was in a field, walking down a path. Then I saw Perry appear on the other side of the path. He looked really happy to see me, and I asked him why he was in the field instead of back at home. He didn't seem to be able to hear me. He was kind of foggy. All he said was 'Where am I?' and I told him I had just been asking him where he was. But he just said 'Where am I?' again. And then 'Hurt… hand… okay?'. And then I started dreaming about riding a rainbow cow, and then about dad holding a rubber plate. And then I woke up."

"Go back to sleep." Ferb grumbled.

"You're not very sympathetic when you're tired." Phineas said. "Where do you think Perry is, Ferb? He said he'd come home after work."

"Maybe work ran long." Ferb said. "We could call Monogram."

"I guess." Phineas sighed.

"I find that if I don't worry too much about things, they turn out okay." Ferb said.

"That's not making me feel better."  
"Why not?"

"Because I'm worried sick."

 **...**

Perry kept his eyes on the dirt path he was walking on.

A bird flew over and sat on a treebranch.

"Moo." Said the bird.

"Birds tweet." Perry told it.

"Tweetity moo." Said the bird.  
"Never mind." Perry thought he saw a clearing up ahead. He quickened his pace.

He was standing in a field with many flowers.

Suddenly Phineas materialized across from him.

Perry grinned. "Phin! What are you doing here?"  
For some reason, though he was compelled to run and hug Phineas, he was rooted to the spot.

Phineas looked equally happy, but also concerned. "Field…back home?"

The rest of Phineas's words were lost. Perry couldn't make anything out. It was as though Phineas were talking underwater in a language Perry couldn't understand.

"Phin, your arm. You've got a cast. What happened? Are you okay?"

Phineas said nothing.

"Phin… I don't know what happened. Somehow I ended up in Gluum- a place for dead people- but I'm not dead. Do you know where I am? If you do, I can get back home. Where am I?"

"…Where you were." Phineas said, after a bit of underwater-sounding noises.

"Phin, enough with the blowfish talk. Where am I? Why are you hurt? What happened to your hand? Are you okay?"

Phineas began to fade.

Perry reached out for him. Phineas did the same.

Perry woke in a cold sweat.

 **...**

"You fell asleep. You okay?" Terrence asked.

Perry rubbed his eyes and sat up in his chair. "I didn't know you could fall asleep in Gluum."

"Of course." Terrence said. "Almost anything you can do in life you can do here. Dreams are the main way ghosts communicate with the living other than actually going to the surface."

"Is that what just happened? I saw Phineas."

"Probably." Terrence said. "What did he say?"

"Hard to tell… he kept talking funny."  
"Your spirit was probably having a hard time keeping you in three spots." Terrence said.

"Here, sort of in the real world, and in the dream?"

Terrence nodded. "Ghosts can split themselves into two parts, but it takes a lot of energy. And they can't go too far from themselves."

"Like thisssss!" A voice said gleefully. Two fennec foxes appeared, floating over the table.

"Frederich." Terrence said disapprovingly. "Why are you here?"

"Iiiiii knoowowwww youuuu." The two Frederichs said together. "You'reeee frienddssss with my ssooonnn, Lowweeee! He liveeesss at the agencyyyy! LOWWWEEEEE!"

"Really? Had no idea." Perry said.

"Donnn'tt mocckkk meee." Frederich hissed. He vanished in a puff of air.

"…Can you do that?" Perry asked.

"I can." Terrence said. "I just don't like to. Like splitting in two, it takes a lot of energy."

"Do you ever have to worry about running out of energy?" Perry asked.

Terrence nodded. "You get tired, and if you lose it all, you're forced to either sleep it back or go to the surface to get more from living things. Only a few Gluum spirits choose to do the latter."

"They drain energy from other people?"  
"That's why Haunted Houses are so dangerous." Terrence said. "Don't worry, though. People rarely have their energy drained to nothing. Worst that happens is they shudder for a few hours from the experience."

"Shudder-tastic." Perry said.

 **...**

Prince gazed intently at Perry's face, trying to figure out how deeply he was sleeping. The doctors had said it was a coma, but she didn't believe that junk. Sometimes people just got tired and needed to sleep for a few days. It wasn't that they couldn't wake up.

"Fine time to get hit by a car." She told him. "Right when I needed ya to keep an eye on Rem. She's going after some huge business-villain. I don't know all the details. But even in that metal suit, I don't trust that she won't get hurt."  
Perry was silent.

"What's with the idiot who hit you, anyway?" Prince said, fondly stroking the cheek that wasn't too scratched up. "He couldn't see the huge loser walking across the street?"

Perry's eye twitched slightly. It gave Prince a little hope.

"There, see, like I told them. You're just sleepy." She reached down to untie her boots. They were driving her insane. Malice had given her high-heeled combat boots as a gift and she was forced to wear them to appear grateful. But whoever invented heels obviously hated people who tried to sneak around without making giant thonking noises when they walked.

"You need help with those?" Someone asked.

Prince looked up. Her eyes narrowed. "I think I can take off my own shoes."

Poppy smiled a little. "Okay. Those laces looked pretty tight."

"What are you doing here?" Prince growled.

"The father of my children is in the hospital." Poppy said. She moved around to the other side of the bed and sat down in a chair. "Seemed only right to come."

"Well, it's not like you can talk to him. He's sleeping." Prince said. "You came here to watch a beat-up guy sleep. He doesn't even know you're here. Why would you come?"

"The same reason you came." Poppy said. "To be there for him."

Prince glowered.

Poppy set a card down on Perry's bedside table. It had a picture of flowers on the front.

Prince could see a little bit of the inside: "Get… feel better… cheers you up! Marilyn."

"So your name's Marilyn now?" Prince said, folding her arms.

Poppy looked uncomfortable. "It's an inside joke we had a long time ago."

"Uh-huh."

Poppy shifted her weight a little. "I'm not your enemy, Prince. I'll be honest… I still do have feelings for him. But they're very faint. I love Toto. I'd never abandon him. Perry's a close friend of mine, is all. He broke up with me, in the end. He wanted to be with you. He's happy with you, I can tell."

"'Course, whatever."

"My parents had the same relationship. They were friends, but they didn't want to be mates. And my father came and visited my mother when she was sick as well. I'm sure if that had been or were the case with your parents…"

"How many freaking times are you gonna poke around in stuff that isn't your business? Shut up." Prince snapped.

"I'm sorry." Poppy said. "I shouldn't have pried."

Prince pulled at a loose string on the end of the hospital bed. "Dad was mindless. Mom wasn't. I was abandoned when I was really little. Lived with my dad's brother. The only time my parents ever even tried to contact me was when my mother asked me to come to my sister's funeral. She died of illness or something. I didn't go. I liked my sister. But I hated mom. I didn't want to do anything for her. As for my dad, he had no idea who I was. Only my uncle really cared about me."

"Sorry about your sister." Poppy said.

Prince shrugged. "I don't know why mom made such a big deal over the funeral. She never liked my sister, either. Almost abandoned her along with me."

Poppy said nothing.

Prince was furious with herself. She had just poured half her past onto the lap of someone she couldn't stand.

"I have to go." Prince said sharply. She stood and walked out of the room.

"You forgot your-"

Prince didn't look back. She knew for a fact she didn't forget something.

She had left behind an inside joke that Marilyn wouldn't get.

 **...**

"Daly? Hellooo?"

"I know you're there, critter-whose-name-I-forget." Daly said, filling another bowl with freezing water and setting it down on his kitchen counter. He dipped his finger into the bowl and tasted the water. "Hm. Needs more water."

"What are you doing?" Perry asked.

"That's for me to know and you to never find out." Daly said.

"Why did you call me here?" Perry was beginning to get annoyed. He wanted to get back to his home. The past few days, Terrence had been busy, so Perry had started decorating his home with the flowers from Willow and some spare paints Mr. Brownie had given him. He was creating a mural across the front of the house. So far it included Phineas, Ferb, his Snugglebear, Linda, Lawrence, Candace, and a Carlos the Caring Clown doll with its head ripped off.

"Wanted to talk to you about something." Daly said, filling up another bowl with cold water. He set it down next to the others on the counter and turned to face Perry. "I saw what you did with your house."

"Well, I'm sorry it's not the shabby, gloomy thing you like, but it's mine and I can do what I want."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Daly said. "Do whatever you want. Regina Lynde blew hers up. Anyway, the townspeople saw your place, too. They're asking me to ask you if you'd want to make their houses look pretty as well."  
Perry frowned. "Huh?"

"You're a decent artist." Daly shrugged. "And while I'd despise my wonderful town being decorated in bright colors and flowers… I think it's a fair idea. You don't have to do it. It'd be without pay, so it'd really stink to do all that work…" Daly glared at him. "And if you touch the town square, I'll banish you from Gluum and your spirit will have to reside elsewhere… probably somewhere much less pleasant."

Perry honestly couldn't think of anywhere less pleasant than Gluum, except for maybe the dentist.

"You're trying to talk me out of it. Listen, I'm not gonna paint the town red. Maybe I'll just paint a few houses. I'll leave your town square alone."

"Fair enough." Daly said.


	6. Chapter 6

Perry stood back to survey his work.

He had to admit, it looked pretty good. Even though the house was falling apart, the paint really brightened it up.

"It's wonderful." Arthur, the ghost of half an alligator, said happily. "I love how you painted the swampy marsh at the base of the house… oh, and my other half! How I miss it! And my old friend Toucan Sampson… he looks wonderful. How did you know to paint that?"

"I looked through your memory photos in your house." Perry said. "I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all! It's so good." Arthur said.

"You think that's good?" Said Teresa, a cat ghost who happened to be Arthur's neighbor. "He painted my house with all my favorite insects."

"And he painted my tree." Regina Lynde said.

Arthur looked at Teresa's house. "Why are there only praying mantises on your house?"

"They're my favorite insects." Teresa said.

"Why?" Arthur said.

"Because they will suck the juices from the people who disrespect life." Teresa said darkly.

"…Okay." Arthur said.

"That weirdness aside, do you guys think I did an okay job?" Perry asked, wiping his hands on his hips. "I mean, some of the subjects are kind of out of proportion. I'm not as good at painting as I am at drawing."

"You did excellent." Arthur said.

"I love mine." Teresa said.

A rattlesnake slithered up to Perry. "Caaannnn yoooouuuu paaaiiinnnttt aaaaa ddeeeaaaddd huummmaaannn onnnn mmyyyy hhooouuussseee?" She hissed.

"Um… sure, I guess. Don't you want something more cheery, though?"

"Deeeaaaddd humaaannsss arrreee cheeerrryyy." The snake said. She slithered away.

"Wow, even Ruby wants you to paint her house." Teresa said. "She barely talks to anyone." She lowered her voice. "She was murdered by humans. It's a really sad story."

"Some creatures have no respect for other creatures." Arthur said, shaking his head.

"Seems like mutual dislike if she wants a dead human on her house." Perry said, setting down his paintbrush. "Tell… Ruby I'll paint her house as soon as I've had a chance to work a little more on mine. I'm gonna go get some more flowers for the front."

"Thanks so much." Arthur said.

"See you soon!" Teresa said happily.

 **...**

Perry opened the door to Willow's home. He was surprised to see another person besides Willow inside.

"…stingy, stubborn!" The man was shouting. He had a mustache and thick eyebrows. "You may as well just accept it and move on! You can't just take everything!"

"Get OUT of my home!" Willow snapped. "I'm not taking this verbal abuse, and neither are my flowers! GET OUT!"

The man shoved a flowerpot over. It crashed to the floor. He shoved past Perry with a grumbled "Excuse me" and ran down the stairs.

Perry closed the door behind him and slowly approached Willow, who was kneeling over the broken flowerpot with tears in her eyes.

"What a jerk." Perry said.

Willow wiped her eyes with her arm. "What do you want? If you don't need anything, beat it."

"Are they okay?"

Willow narrowed her eyes and ran her fingers along the petals of the flowers that were lying in the scattered pile of dirt. "My sunflowers."

Perry couldn't tell the difference between sunflowers and other flowers, but he didn't mention this. "We could put them in another pot."

"Get a pot." Willow demanded.

"You're welcome." Perry said silently. He found an empty pot on a shelf near the door and handed it to Willow.

She carefully scooped up the sunflowers and remaining dirt and placed them in the new pot, gently packing the soil in place.

"You're good with flowers." Perry said, trying to help her feel better.

Willow looked at the spot above his head. "They deserve more than people give them."

"They're beautiful."

Willow stroked the stem of the largest sunflower. "They're persistent. They're tough. They never give up."

"I thought that was weeds." Perry said.

Willow looked at the front door. "Weeds are persistent, too. But their aim is to rid of the flowers. The flowers don't try to rid the world of anything. They just are. That's why I like them."

Perry nodded. "I guess that makes sense."

 **...**

Perry did not expect seven people to be sitting at his dinner table when he arrived home.

"Surprise!" Said Mr. Brownie, holding up a chocolate brownie cake.

"Surprised." Perry said wearily. Spending time with the villagers of Gluum was the last thing he wanted to do right now. He just wanted to eat and take a nap…

"We made a dinner party for you." Teresa said. "To thank you for painting our houses."

"And my tree." Added Regina Lynde.

Ruby hissed in approval.

"Uh… great, guys." Perry said. He smiled at Terrence, who he had just noticed standing in the back of the group. "Mind if I talk with Terrence for a second?"

"Okay, but it won't be a party without the guest of honor!" Mr. Brownie said.

Perry led Terrence into his bedroom and closed the door.

"I like what you've done with your place." Terrence commented.

"Terrence, I beg you." Perry said. "Tell me how to get back home. I'm so homesick I think I'm going to lose it any moment now. I love being with you. I like Arthur, and Teresa, and Willow, and I kind of like Mr. Brownie, and I'm not quite as weirded out by Ruby and Regina as I was at first. But please. I have to get home."

Terrence looked sad. "I want to help you, Per. I really do. But unless we can figure out what happened to you… don't you remember anything at all?"

"I remember some guy holding me and saying something about Carl. That's it."

"I guess we'll have to ask Daly what to do."

"Will he be willing to help? Daly doesn't like me."

"I'm sure he does." Terrence said unconvincingly.

"Fine, we'll ask him. I just… I hate to think of everyone back home worrying about me. I miss them. So bad."

He felt tears slipping into his eyes. Stupid tears. They made your throat feel funny and made you look helpless.

Terrence thought for a moment.

Daly shimmered into existence by Perry's bed. "You called, Terrence?"

"We're trying to figure out why Perry's down here." Terrence said. "Could you…"

"Fine, not like I had anything else to do." Daly muttered. He padded over to the wall and placed his paw on it.

The floor separated from the wall and began to sink into the ground. Perry looked up as the wall and ceiling got higher and higher. Dirt and bones surrounded them.

Finally the floor stopped. The dirt turned shiny and black, like a television screen. A new ceiling closed over them.

It was pitch-black.

"Um… Daly?" Perry began.

"Hush." Was the reply.

The screens lit up. They began to play a movie.

It was raining. Thunder crackled. Cars were speeding down the road. People were walking down the street.

A clock was lying face-up on a street corner.

A black car spun around the corner, out of control. It swerved and smashed into the clock.

The screen went dark again, and the ceiling lit up, as though lightning struck. A clock tumbled down and landed at their feet with a crash.

Perry yelped.

The clock was golden, and wet as though it had just been in the rain. A picture of a mountain was carved into the top.

The face of the clock was cracked. The hour hand pointed at ten. The minute hand at twenty-two.

Terrence stared at it. He looked like he wanted to touch it, but was unsure if he could.

Perry was shaking. He didn't like the way the clock had dropped down out of the ceiling.

Daly casually picked the clock up and looked at the back.

He turned it around and showed it to Perry.

Inscribed on the back of the clock were the letters K.O.M.A.

"You were hit by that car, on that street corner, at the exact time that this clock stopped at." Daly said. "You are not dead. You are in a coma."

Perry was breathing hard, trying to settle his nerves.

"You are not dead." Daly repeated. "But your time is running out."


	7. Chapter 7

"All right, guys, clear out." Daly said.

Mr. Brownie looked up from his brownie cake. "But we were just about to sing."

"Happy House-Painting-Day tooooo youuuu-" Teresa began.

"Lovely, Teresa. Be quiet." Daly said. "Listen, guys, Perry's had a bit of a shock and I don't think he really wants to eat your brownie cake right now."

"I'll leave it for later, then." Mr. Brownie said.

"No party? Aw." Regina Lynde said. "I guess I'll go back to my tree."

One by one, the ghosts left the house. Finally, just Daly, Terrence and Perry were left.

Daly handed Perry the broken clock.

"Getting out of a coma is difficult." Daly said cheerfully. "It takes a while. You have to get somewhere close enough to the surface to call out to your body. Once your body hears your spirit, it will absorb it and you'll be whole again. Luckily, I built Gluum Mountain exactly for that purpose. You climb up there, you'll be able to get back. It's hard, but doable."

"…What did you mean, my time is running out?" Perry asked.

"The longer you stay down here, the more your spirit becomes attached to the non-living world. You're far from your body, and your body cannot hold onto your spirit. Once your spirit is freed from your body, your body will continue to function for a little longer, but eventually it shuts itself down once the brain loses consciousness."

"So… I should go now."

Daly shook his head. "No. Absolutely not." He glared at Perry. "You can't climb the mountain until after the spring storms of Gluum have died down."

"Spring Storms?"

"I'm not explaining it all." Daly grumbled. "Just keep a close watch on your clock."

He vanished.

Terrence put a hand on Perry's shoulder. "You okay, Per?"

"No." Perry said honestly. "No, I'm not."

 **...**

"What, no invention today?"

"Go away, Candace." Phineas said unhappily. He was trying to get the right amount of sugar in his iced tea. Ferb wasn't helping matters by pouring six packets of sugar into the pitcher every time Phineas looked away.

"Ferb, please stop." Phineas said. "You can make your own glass sugary."

He knew adding sugar was Ferb's way of distracting himself from thinking about Perry, but Phineas just couldn't take anything else not going the way he wanted it to.

"It's because Perry's gone, isn't it?"

"He's not gone." Phineas said. "He'll be back."

"I wonder if it had something to do with those robot elephants." Candace said. "I tried to warn you, Phineas. Those stupid inventions were gonna be the end of you one day. You already broke your arm. And your ugly platypus probably got sucked into some void in the elephant-building process. I'm right, aren't I?"

"Candace." Ferb said calmly.

"I am!" Candace said. "Phineas, why don't you LISTEN to me? You should have stopped building those things when you-"

"SHUT UP!" Phineas yelled.

Candace fell silent.

"You wanna know what happened to him? He got HIT BY A CAR, Candace. It had NOTHING to do with US our OUR INVENTIONS, so the next time you assume something, DON'T! HE GOT HIT BY A CAR AND HE'S IN THE HOSPITAL AND WE DON'T KNOW IF HE'S GONNA WAKE UP."

"I… I don't understand." Candace said, her eyes wide.

"YOU KNOW HOW WE KNOW? BECAUSE HE'S NOT A MINDLESS ANIMAL! HE'S A SECRET AGENT AND WE'VE BEEN COMMUNICATING WITH HIM FOR TWO YEARS NOW! SO SHUT UP BECAUSE YOU DON'T! KNOW! ANYTHING!"

Phineas covered his mouth.

"He's… a what?" Candace asked.

Phineas burst into tears and ran out of the room.

Ferb unwrapped another sugar packet. "A long while ago, we found out Perry was an agent, but we had our memories erased. Phineas remembered again after a bit, and we began secretly communicating with Perry using animal translators." Ferb pulled a tiny device out of his ear and showed it to Candace. "His Major- the man in charge of his organization- found out, and so we're not allowed to tell anyone or Perry will have to be relocated away from us to keep his identity a secret. That's why we never told you, or anyone, really. And as Phineas said, this week Perry was hit by a car and is now in the hospital. His Major called us a few days ago."

"Woah. Slow down, Ferb. What?"

Ferb turned and left in the direction Phineas had gone.

 **...**

The moment Perry had finished his breakfast, he heard a knock on his door.

Perry licked the butter from his fingers and went to answer it. He wasn't too surprised to see Mr. Brownie standing there.

"What?" Perry asked.

"I just came to ask you if you knew about the annual Gluum party tonight."

"No. And I don't do too well with parties."

"Oh, a shame." Mr. Brownie said sadly. "It's quite a fun event. All the people get together in the village square and eat campfire food. I expect your friend Terrence is going. He comes every year."

"…I guess… I just really don't do too well around crowds."

"We're no crowd here." Mr. Brownie said. "There are a lot of us, but Gluum is small enough that it's more like a giant family. I know Teresa would be glad if you came. Ruby and Arthur, too. You've made quite an impression on them."

"I'll consider." Perry said.

"Oh, good!" Mr. Brownie said. "I'll tell Michaela to bring some marshmallows for you."

"That's oka-" Perry sighed. Mr. Brownie was already running down the path into the town. "Never mind."

 **...**

Perry let himself into Willow's home and knocked on the wall. "Is this a bad time?"

Willow didn't look up from watering her flowers. "Whatever. What do you want?"

"I found a flower in the middle of town that I thought you'd like to give a home." Perry said. "I don't know what kind it is, sorry. I'm bad with flowers."

Willow set down the watering can and approached him. Perry held out the flowerpot.

Willow ran her hand over the top of the flower, her eyes on Perry. "Chrysanthemum. I don't have one."

"Now you do."

"Thank you, Perry." Willow said. She took the pot out of his hands and set it down next to her violets.

Perry was glad to be rid of her gaze. He brushed himself off. "I got dragged into this annual party thing tonight. You ever go?"

"No." Willow said, squeezing her eyes shut as though she had a headache. "It's better to stay here. No annoying people bothering me."

"Heeeyyy." Perry said teasingly.

"Not you." Willow said, focusing on the shelves across from her. "Not you. Just everyone else." She tilted her head to one side and looked forlornly at the shelves. "Socializing."

"I get it." Perry said. "I hate parties, too. I've never been a very social person."

"But you're still going." She said.

"Yeah. My friend's going. I kind of have to. Would you want to come if I took you? We could help each other not socialize."

"Why would I want to?" Willow asked.

"Never mind." Perry said, taken aback. "Sorry. I should have guessed. I mean, I'd say the same thing."

"I'll go." Willow said quietly.

"…You sure?"

"Yeah. I just don't know how to get there. You'll have to take me."

"That's fine." Perry said.

 **...**

 **ANNUAL GLUUM RESIDENT PARTY**

Daly stepped back, proud with the way the sign had turned out. Sure, it was slightly torn on one side from where Bucky the dog skeleton had chewed it, and the letters were a little off-center, but Daly still liked the way it looked.

"What do you think?" He asked Kevinly Drake, Mr. Brownie's pet warthog.

"Quite nice, Dalrond Wuaz. I love the simplicity of the design." Kevinly Drake replied. "It makes a statement on the delicateness of one's situation."

"Yeah, and it's crooked!" Daly said happily.

Kevinly Drake tipped his monocle and ambled over to Mr. Brownie.

"Everything's almost all set." Daly told Arthur. "Who's supplying the music?"

"That new rock singer that just moved here." Arthur said. "Tripped over an amp."

"Ah." Daly said. "Well, tell him we're happy he's here to help. Where's Terrence? He said he would help Michaela set up the campfire."

"He's at Dexter's shop, buying some wood." Michaela, a white horse, said.

"Dex is making him pay?" Daly demanded. "This is for the town party. Tell him I'll make him clean up afterward if we have to pay for the firewood."

Michaela pranced away. Daly headed over to Mr. Brownie.

"Mr. Brownie, you're in charge of getting the chocolate for the s'mores. Can you handle that?"

"Chocolate is my specialty." Mr. Brownie said. "I had a chocolate company back in my hometown. Mr. Brown's Crazy Chocolate."

"I know, Mr. Brownie." Daly said. "That's why you're on chocolate duty."

"Oh." Mr. Brownie said. "I thought you just pulled my name out of a hat."

"Yeah, that too." Daly said.

 **...**

"You ready to go?" Perry called from the bottom of the stairs.

"I guess. Whatever." Willow said. She carefully and slowly descended the stairs. Once she reached the bottom, she kept her hand on the railing. "Lead me?"

"Uh… sure."

Willow looked above his head and held out her hand. Perry took it.

They started walking. Willow tightened her grip on his hand. She stared straight ahead.

"Ow. You okay?"

"Just haven't been out in a while." Willow muttered.

"You're cutting off the circulation to my fingers."

"Slow down. I can't keep up."

 **...**

"Cool, you came to celebrate." Terrence said. He gave Perry a hug. "Sorry I haven't seen you in a few days. I was busy helping set up."

"Nice sign." Perry said, pointing at the crooked banner that hung above the fire.

"Daly made it." Terrence said.

"Cool legumes."

"Come on down for the campfire sing-along!" Mr. Brownie shouted. "Preformed by me, Mr. George Brown, and Kevinly Drake, my trusty warthog!"

"I think I'll take a rain check on the sing-along and come back for marshmallows." Perry said.

"Same." Willow said.

"Find me when you get back." Terrence waved to them and vanished into the crowd.

Mr. Brownie stood up on a tall podium, strumming a guitar. "OHHHHHHH…"

He and Kevinly Drake began to sing. "AN ORANGE COW FROM GEORGIA, I'M GOING HOME TO SEE…"

"Let's head to that overlook." Perry said.

"Fine." Willow said.

Perry led her up to a small hill looking out over a brook. There were a few twinkling lights bubbling across the water, as though Gluum had the same night sky as Earth.

"It's beautiful." Perry said. "The only pretty place I've seen here. Daly must not have touched it."

"Smells like summer evenings." Willow said. "The grass is warm and wet. Cool breeze."

She was looking straight ahead, her caved-in white pupils blank of emotion.

Perry gave a sharp intake of breath.

"What?" Willow asked, alarmed. "Did something happen?"

"I'm… sorry. I just realized…"

"You scared me." Willow glared at the area above his head.

"I'm sorry… I just… I didn't know you were… blind."

Willow raised an eyebrow.

"Sorry." Perry said again.

"I thought you knew." Willow said. She turned back to the landscape. "I just thought you were nice enough to not make a big deal out of it like everyone else does."

"I wouldn't have even if I knew. But… I'm sorry, I should have figured it out. I'm just out of it right now."

"Whether you knew or not shouldn't matter." Willow said. "I'm still the same cranky anti-social hermit I've always been."

"You're not cranky." Perry said. "You're just lonely."

"I think George's stupid singing stopped." Willow said. "We should head back. And now that you know I'm blind, maybe you could lead me back a little better."

"Sure. Take my arm."


	8. Chapter 8

Monty stood and waited by the receptionist desk.

Someone tapped him on the shoulder.

It was Vanessa.

"Hey." Monty said, grinning at her. "What are you doing here?"

"My dad told me what happened." Vanessa said, smiling a little. "I think he's secretly worried. I'm sorry about Perry. Did they say if he was going to be all right?"

"They don't know yet." Monty sighed. "Right now, all I know is that my father's lunch is ready."

Vanessa gave him a pity laugh.

"I got your flowers." Monty said. "They mixed them up with Agent P's presents. Man, if sleeping in got you the same amount of gifts as a coma did, I'd be rich."

He guessed he'd gone too far in the stupid-jokes-that-might-actually-make-Vanessa-laugh department, because he got no response.

"I've known him since he was a little pup." Monty said.

"He's a cool guy." Vanessa said. "And I know my dad appreciates him. He's been bringing him so many teddy bears, I'm sure that room is filled."

"It is." Monty said. "I tripped over them when I tried to visit him. Luckily, it was a soft landing. He has tons of cards, too. And for some reason, there's a tiny boot next to his bed."

"What size?" Vanessa asked.

Monty started laughing, but stopped abruptly when he saw her serious expression. "Like, Perry's size."

"Oh." Vanessa said, losing interest. "Well, I'd better get back to my dad's place. He'll start freaking out if he finds out I snuck out the back door."

"Okay." Monty said. "See you, I guess."

 **...**

"Sixteen times I lost this arm." An elderly ghost told Perry, pointing at his arm. "Sixteen times I got it back."

"Seventeen!" Giggled a puppy ghost, running off with the man's arm.

The man shook his remaining fist. "SHYYY!"

Daly laughed as Shy streaked past him. "Seventeen going on eighteen, Sir Knightenhorse!"

The old man grumbled something and went after Shy.

Terrence filled the spot where Sir Knightenhorse had once sat next to Perry. "How you doing?"

"All right." Perry said. "I'm kind of getting sleepy, but I'm all right."

"I'm glad you brought Willow." Terrence said. "She seems to be having a good time."

Willow and Kevinly Drake appeared to be arm-wrestling. Three ghosts Perry didn't know were cheering them on.

"I can't believe I didn't know she was blind." Perry said. "I mean, she's so capable it just never crossed my mind. I should have known, though. It was obvious. Impressive, though. You know she can tell each type of flower apart just by touching it? I can't even tell them apart by LOOKING at them."

"She likes flowers." Terrence said.

"That's for sure." Perry said. "Why is she blind, though? I thought ghosts didn't carry their afflictions with them into Gluum. I mean, I'm all in one piece."

"Anything that has to do with their death doesn't come with them." Terrence said. "Arthur was half an alligator before he died. It had no cause for his death."

"How on EARTH is he like that?"

"I don't know. Perhaps he was a magician."

"How did Willow die?"

"I think from illness. And pretty young, too. She doesn't look to be much more than three."

"So the illness didn't come with her… but her blindness did?"  
"Yeah."

"Where's Leanna?" Sir Knightenhorse asked, reattaching his arm. Shy giggled maniacally.

"Dunno." Daly responded. "But I couldn't care less, anyway. I exiled her outta the town forever ago. She was behaving oddly."

"Why would you exile her?" Kevinly Drake asked. His momentary distraction caused Willow to shove his arm down on the table. He paid no attention to the Willow supporters cheering around him. "She's been a Gluum resident for years. And it'd break her heart to leave that mansion."

"I moved the mansion." Daly shrugged. "And it doesn't matter. When people start getting weird, I move them. Remember the last time someone was being weird and I did nothing? Simon Sircumference. Nearly took over Gluum."

"Good point, Dalrond." Kevinly Drake said.

 **...**

Perry ate the last of his pasta and sat back, staring at the ceiling.

The party had actually been kind of fun. Arthur and Terrence sat with him to watch the fireworks, and Teresa asked him to dance a couple of times. Now that it was all over, Perry was kind of sad… and a little overwhelmed.

He hadn't ever made so many friends all at once. Back when he was younger, Terrence was his only friend. Now he had Pinky, Peter, Darren and Devon, of course, but it had taken him a while to befriend them. Especially Darren. And he didn't see friends like Morey the moose and Sven the seagull very often.

But now, over the course of only a few days, he had made friends with Arthur, Teresa, Ruby, Willow… even Mr. Brownie. And he had grown to like Daly a little more. He appreciated the way Daly was able to take things so lightly.

His thoughts turned to his family and friends back in the real world, and the homesickness hit him once again. He missed Phineas… Ferb… Candace… Monogram… Doofenshmirtz… That guy that always walked the poodle near the Quickie-Mart… Jeremy… Linda… Lawrence… Baljeet…

By the time Perry arrived at Kendrine Adems, the teen pop sensation he so despised, he was in tears. He just flat-out missed Danville. Why did he have to get hit by that stupid car?

"Aww. Don't be cry."

Perry turned around and glared at Daly. "Will you go away?"

Daly grinned.

"What the heck do you want?"

"Just thought you'd like to know that as miserable as you are here, you've made a lotta the residents super-happy."

"I'm not miserable. Not as much as I was when I first got here."

"Then why is a steady stream of H2O leaking out of your eyes?"

Perry wiped his cheeks. "Look, will you just leave me alone?"

"I'd love to, really, but I'm obligated to ensure everyone's at least slightly happy here." Daly pointed at a chain that had somehow appeared around his hind leg. "Now your burden's on me. It's gotta have something to do with Gluum."  
"I want to go back home. To my real home."

"To pain, suffering, and the strains of life." Daly said mockingly.

"You don't understand." Perry said. "Yes, life is hard sometimes, but it's also wonderful. Just because you couldn't stand it, and you love death and decay like unicorns love rainbows and bunnies, doesn't mean that it's a bad thing."

Daly smiled.

"What are you smiling about?"

"You love life."

"Yes, I do, as a matter of fact."

"Do you respect it?"

"What the heck is that supposed to mean?"

Daly closed his eyes for a moment, concentrating. "Ruby was murdered because a pair of humans were bored. Terrence was murdered for the benefit of a human. Teresa died the way you almost did… disrespected, though. Have you met Ursula, the urchin? Killed slowly. Painfully. For the interest of a human. And Arthur? Simply for the joy of the hunt."

Perry blinked back tears. "Shut up."

"You do respect life." Daly said. "You see the horrible ways in which life was taken from each creature. And that, Perry, gives back to them what was taken from them. Yes, their lives are gone, but they have gained back the respect and dignity nabbed from them. Because of you. You are a good soul."

"What does that have to do with anything?" Perry asked.

"Nothing." Daly said. "Save for the fact that we would all miss you if you left."

"You don't even like me." Perry grumbled.

"What more should you expect from a creature that died of his own greed and thirst for revenge?" Daly asked.

Perry bit back a sarcastic reply.

"Besides." Daly smiled smugly. "I respect you. You're not trapped here unless I keep you here. Go forth. Climb the mountain. Return to your true home."

 **...**

"I shouldn't have told Candace." Phineas said, curled up on his bed. "I shouldn't have."

"Once Perry wakes up, we'll figure out what to do."

"And if he doesn't?"

Ferb looked back up at his videogame on the projector in front of their beds. The little tiny character hopped over 8-bit snakes.

Phineas watched as the character died again and again. "Those snakes are so close together. It looks hard."

"It is hard." Ferb said. He tried to jump his character over the snakes again and failed. "Aggh."

The game reloaded. Ferb began jumping over the snakes. A random dancing cactus appeared on the screen and stood next to the snakes. "AAAH! WHY IS THERE A CACTUS ALL OF A SUDDEN?"

Phineas giggled. "Cactus-TASTIC!"

"Okay, that's it. If this game is going to keep glitching, I'm not playing." Ferb switched his system off. "Good night, Phin."

"Night."

The room got cold. A faint light glowed through the window.

"Turn your booklight off." Phineas muttered.

"It's not me." Ferb insisted.

The boys sat up and looked out the window.

A thin dog wearing a tattered coat and heavy chains smiled at them with pointed teeth. He was grey-blue, and almost transparent. He motioned them over to them.

"Who are you?" Phineas asked.

"Malete from the eighteen-hundreds." The dog whispered in a language Phineas was somehow able to understand. He grinned maliciously. "You know where your platypus is?"

"In the hospital." Phineas said.

"No." Malete said. "Come."

He vanished.

Phineas and Ferb looked at each other.

Ferb stood up. He grabbed his coat from the side of his bed and opened the window.

"Ferb..." Phineas got up and went over to stand next to him. "I don't like this."

A freezing wind swept over them, and suddenly they were standing by an ominous-looking mansion. It was huge.

Malete stood in front of it. He waved them closer.

"The night I died… a cold, cruel one. Right over there." He pointed with a clawed finger at the overgrown street in front of the mansion. "There was once a small home. Not much to look at. About as broken-down and rotting as this mansion now, but with a history. That home was the death of me. Both I and another dog, by the name of Wuaz, attempted to claim it as our own. We fought. I won. I killed Wuaz. But before the light went out of his eyes forever, he dragged me down with him. He managed to continue on. He is free. He goes where he likes. But me… I am forever chained here. A trapped soul. One that can never move on."

"And what does this mansion have to do with that?" Phineas asked.

"This mansion… the heart and soul of one person. You can hear them." Malete said. "They speak to you. They come to you. Feed on energy. But you can hear them."

"…What?" Phineas asked.

Malete rattled his chains. "Hear them. Speak to them. It works." He vanished.

Phineas slowly approached the mansion.

"…Perry?" He called.

A squeal sounded, and Phineas jumped back.

"We have to find Perry." Phineas said. "That dog couldn't have just searched us out for nothing."

Ferb nodded. "Onward."


	9. Chapter 9

It was dark.

"Buh-lowfish." Ferb said loudly.

"Shh!" Phineas whispered.

Even though there were faint lights along the walls, Phineas still felt extremely nervous. He didn't like the feeling this place gave off.

Ferb jumped suddenly. "Did you hear that?"

"Stop it." Phineas said, his voice shaking.

"No, really."

Phineas listened. He could hear very faint whispers.

 _Grabbed me by the arms…_

 _People coming…_

 _Hear something…_

 _Where? Where are they…_

 _I like sandwiches…_

"F…Ferb…" Phineas clutched Ferb's arm.

"Perry?" Ferb called.

He walked over to a door near the stairwell and opened it. His face paled.

"What?" Phineas asked. "What?"

A chalk-white, transparent man was standing in the room. It appeared to be the kitchen.

He vanished almost instantly.

Phineas felt something cold brush against his back.

"Leave." A voice whispered, directly in his ear. "You are not wanted here. Leeavvee."

"Look." Ferb said.

He pointed. On the table sat an adorable baby platypus, giving off a faint pink glow.

"Sneakers?" Phineas asked.

Sneakers drooled bubbles and blinked her huge eyes.

"What is she doing here?" Phineas asked. "We gotta get her out of here."

Ferb picked Sneakers up. "Which way did we come in?"

Phineas turned, expecting to see the door they had entered from. Instead there was just a wall.

"…There… I think?"

"There's another door there." Ferb said.

"LEEEAVVVEEE!" Screeched a voice. "LEEAVVEE NOWWW!"

Sneakers opened her mouth, emitting a small noise.

The voice quieted.

Sneakers made another noise in a different tone.

Phineas felt warmer. The cold air seemed to be drawing away from Sneakers.

Ferb looked down at her. "She appears to be… _singing_."

Sneakers was, in a series of ominous sounds that did not sound like any noise a platypus could create.

"Well… i…it seems to be keeping the ghosts away." Phineas said.

"Sing it, Sneakers." Ferb said jauntily.

They headed through the new door.

 **...**

Perry knocked on Willow's wall.

"Can't you see I'm busy?" Willow was sitting on the floor with her back to him, gluing a red stone to the front of a flowerpot.

"I'm going." Perry said.

"Good. Come back later. Unless it wasn't anything important."

"No, Willow. I'm going. I'm leaving Gluum. I'm going back to the living world."

Willow paused for a moment. Then she returned to her gluing.

"I… I'm pretty sure I could take you back with me, if you wanted."

"What's for me up there?" Willow asked.

"Is that a no?"

"It's a no." Willow stood up and placed the decorated flowerpot on a stool.

"Well… so long as you're staying down here, I guess you can have my house if you want. It'll be a lot more room for your flowers. They can be on shelves instead of on footstools and chairs."

"Fine." Willow said.

"And if you ever need anyone to talk to… I already told Terrence to look out for you. You remember Terrence, right?"

"Feathers. Yes."

"He's a lot like me, except more friendly."

"I don't get why you like being around me." Willow said suddenly.

"…What?" Perry asked.

"Most people don't. Just saying."

"Most people didn't take the time to know you." Perry said. "You're a good person, Willow. Really. And I know your flowers appreciate you."

For the first time since he had met her, something almost resembling a smile crossed Willow's face. "Maybe. Thanks… for everything. If you come back, let me know."

"Sure." Perry said.

He turned to leave, and noticed something on the door.

"…Is that your name on that sign on the door?" Perry asked.

Willow shrugged. She ran her hand on the Braille on the bottom of the sign. "Yes. Willow Duchess Curran."

"…Your last name is Curran?"

"Yes."

Perry frowned. "You… by any chance… don't know a Prince Curran, do you?"

Willow shook her head. "No."

"Didn't think so." Perry said. "Sorry. It's just someone I know. We'll meet again." He reached for the door.

"I know a Princess Curran." Willow said. "My sister."

Perry's heart stopped. "Couldn't be. Prince is an only child."

Willow shrugged. "She probably didn't take my death lightly. I was the only member of our family she liked besides our uncle. You know her, you said?"

"Yeah."

"How is she?"

"Great… doing great."

"Good. Say hello to her for me."

"I will." Perry said, still a little shocked at having just found his long-gone sister-in-law. "…I'm sure she'll be glad to hear I saw you."

 **...**

Perry sized up the large mountain, sitting innocently in his path. It was large and dark. A swirling mess of colors spun in the sky above it.

He barely heard the ghosts behind him saying their goodbyes.

"Per?"

Perry turned. Terrence put his arm around him.

"Safe journey back, okay?"

"Thanks."

Perry gave him a hug. Terrence's spirit still smelled just like Terrence used to, the scent of hay and fresh grass.

It comforted Perry.

"What's with the skies?" A pig ghost asked.

"Spring Storms." Daly muttered. His eyes glowed slightly, and he stepped forward.

Mr. Brownie put a hand on Daly's back.

"You know what will happen, Daly." Teresa warned. "Last time you climbed up there…"

"I'm guiding you." Daly said.

Perry looked at him. "Huh?"

"I'll take you up the mountain." Daly said. "Could be dangerous. Spring Storms are brewing."

"Daly, no!" Teresa said.

"I wouldn't…" Mr. Brownie began.

"Shut it." Daly snapped. "You guys stay down here. I'm in charge, and I'm guiding this spirit up this mountain. You got that?"

Mr. Brownie and Kevinly Drake exchanged nervous glances.

"Come." Daly said. He began to claw his way up the mountain.

After a slight hesitation, Perry gave Terrence one last squeeze and followed.

"Goodbye!" Mr. Brownie said.

"Come back soon!" Arthur said. "And don't take that offensively!"

"Watch out for-" Sir Knightenhorse began, before Shy ran off with his arm again.

After climbing a few feet, Perry looked down one last time.

Arthur, Teresa and Mr. Brownie smiled encouragingly at him. Terrence was gazing at him fondly with tears in his eyes, keeping a firm grip on Willow's hand.

Willow glanced upward, and for a second, their eyes met. Perry knew she couldn't see him. But it felt like a goodbye all the same.

"I'm not stopping, so you'd better keep up." Daly said.

Perry took a deep breath and turned away, focusing back on the dark swirls in the sky.

 **...**

"This looks like a hallway of some sort." Ferb said.

Sneakers continued to sing her little song. Phineas wished she had picked a more cheerful tune. The ominous little sounds added to the already spooky mood.

"Ah- look down there for a minute, brother." Ferb said, pointing behind him. But Phineas had already seen what was directly in front of them.

A skeleton, lying facedown on the ground.

 **...**

The higher they climbed, the more alive Perry felt. He was aware of air entering and leaving his lungs. He could feel the cool cloth of sheets against him. He was in a dream that he couldn't wake up from, but once he got to the top, he knew he'd be able to open his eyes and find himself back in his own body.

It was a strange sensation, a kind of weakening strength.

He noticed a change in Daly, too. Daly seemed to be getting angrier the higher they got, and he was turning a strange color of transparent blue. He snapped at Perry any time he got too close or too far behind.

"Not far now." Daly said irritably. "Why didn't I build this stupid town closer to the surface? Then I could have just made Gluum Hill instead of Gluum Mountain."

He stopped suddenly, seconds away from the peak. Perry nearly bumped into him.

Daly turned to look up at the sky, his eyes flaming with rage.

Deep laughter sounded in the distance.

"All right, I'm here." Daly snarled. "You can come out now."

The clouds swirled into the shape of another dog, in chains and wearing a tattered coat.

"It's been a long time since you've come up, Dalrond." The dog said.

"I will not free you, Malete!" Daly shouted. "You will be forced to roam aimlessly forever!"

"Although I am chained physically, you are not free either." Malete said. "You have invisible chains of rage, envy and revenge holding you back. It is as it has been. I win, you set me free. You win, I set you free. We both lose, everything remains until the next time we meet."

Daly leapt into the air. The two dogs collided, growling and snapping at each other, all while floating magically in midair.

Perry felt like all they needed was a dramatic soundtrack.

"Uh… if you don't mind, Daly, I'm just gonna head up to the top." Perry said.

Daly made no objection whatsoever.

Perry placed his hand on the next niche and hoisted himself up. He was almost to the top of the mountain. He could feel himself waking. He was physically pulling himself into consciousness. He was…

In the middle of some random person's hallway. A young woman wearing an apron was staring at him.

"Great, there is another person in this house." She mumbled in a strange accent. "I have to fix the locks."

"Um… I was kind of… am I…?"

"Climbing the mountain, yes. I'll move the house in a moment, and then you will be on your way." The girl said. "My name is Leanna."

"Figures." Perry muttered. "Right when I'm finally about to get home, I wind up in some random mansion of a girl with a funny accent."

"Excuse... me? Did you say something?" Leanna asked.

"Nothing." Perry said.


	10. Chapter 10

Perry followed the girl into a room that appeared to be the kitchen.

"I was the cook for the woman who lived in a place like this, but then… the accident." Leanna sighed. "I am happy I was able to live in this kind of house again. I love the house. It is my one true home."

She turned the light on. In the light, Perry could see that Leanna was strikingly beautiful for a human. She had long strawberry-blonde hair and blue eyes. Her face had a concerned expression.

"How's zee weather?" Perry asked mockingly.

"I know you must be… a little unhappy at being kept here." Leanna said. "I am sorry. I shall work on moving the house shortly. Daly told me to leave the town and… I should have put it somewhere else. Help yourself to anything in the fridge. I will be back."

Leanna's heels clicked away. Perry opened up the huge fridge.

It was completely filled with apples.

"What a selection." He mumbled, slamming the door shut again. He was very attached to his body here, at what he guessed was the mountain's peak. He felt a mattress against his back, his head against a pillow, felt his limbs both responding to his movements here and refusing to move in the real world. He tried desperately to open his eyes, but at no avail.

He would just have to wait until Leanna moved her stupid hulking hunk of mansion.

 **...**

"Perry?" Phineas called, opening up a refrigerator. "Ew. Rotting apples."

A large ghost swept past Ferb. Sneakers began to sing louder.

"Ferb?" Phineas pointed.

They were completely surrounded by shrieking ghosts.

A cloaked ghost reached out for Phineas… and slowly pulled back its hood, revealing the friendly-looking face of a man in his late teens.

"Hi. We're kind of stuck." Said the cloaked ghost. "Can you help us?"

Phineas stuttered.

"Sure." Ferb said.

"My name is Richard." The cloaked ghost said, sitting down in the air. "This is Tina, Henry Brown, Louis…"

Phineas looked at the hundreds of ghosts surrounding him. "Um, maybe we'll learn your names later."

"Yeah." Richard said. "Well, how do I explain this… We're from a place called Gluum."

"I've heard of Gluum." Phineas said. "Our platypus was talking about it after he visited it during an operation. We thought he was crazy."

"Good, I won't have to go into specifics. Anyway- all of us here- we're dead now, but when we arrived in Gluum before, we were simply spirits detached from our bodies. We were told by the ghost in charge, Daly Wuaz, that we had to climb Gluum Mountain in order to get back to our bodies. Sounded easy enough."

"See, when I lived in Gluum, my neighbor was a girl named Leanna." Said a cow, the ghost named Louis. "She lived in a huge mansion- an exact replica of this one. She was a cook working for a rich family. When the family died, she inherited their mansion. She loved it more than anything, or so she kept telling me. Later she was exiled out of Gluum, and I didn't see her again until… that day."

The ghosts stared at the floor for a moment. Richard began to speak again.

"I was almost to the top of Gluum Mountain when I suddenly wound up in Leanna's mansion. Leanna greeted me. She appeared glad to see me again, and apologized for her house being in the way. I was confused at first. She offered to move it. She told me to stay. I let my guard down. And then… she drained me of all my life energy, killing me forever- and chaining me to this real mansion, where I have stayed for years. That was her plan. Capture ghosts with life energy. Drain the energy for herself… so she could return to life in the mansion she loved. Daly has no idea. If he did, he'd banish her completely."

"Crazy." Phineas said.

Richard nodded. "Same thing happened to these guys. We're stuck here unless we can defeat her."

"What happens if she gets enough energy?" Phineas asked.

"She returns to life." Louis said.

"And then she'll probably watch a movie or something." Said another ghost.

"How do we defeat her?" Ferb asked.

"We have to prevent her passage to the real world." Richard said. "Did you happen to come across her skeleton?"

"Yes." Phineas said. "But… the door to it disappeared, I think."

"This home is a maze." Richard said. "But as long as we find and destroy that skeleton, everything will be fine."

"Wait… some ghost told us our platypus was in here. And he's in a coma. Do you think…"

"Haven't seen a platypus… yet." Richard said.

"Ferb!" Phineas grabbed Ferb's shoulders. "We gotta save Perry!"

The ghosts stared at him.

"…And get hundreds of ghosts back home to Gluum, too." Phineas said.

 **...**

Perry climbed upstairs. He was starting to get annoyed. He could have been home by now, if that stupid mansion hadn't been there. And Leanna appeared to be taking her sweet time moving it.

He ran into her on the third landing. She appeared to be thinking about something.

"Look, I'll help you move this place if you like. I really gotta get home."

"Do not worry. You will be in the real world soon." Leanna said. She frowned and looked across the room. "Where did I put that…"

" _Perry!_ "

The voice was very faint, but Perry recognized it as Phineas's all the same.

"Phin?" He whispered.

" _Perry! Where are you? Don't let her get you!_ "

Perry looked at Leanna.

Normally, he would never trust anyone. It always took him a while to be sure of people. And in his line of work, trust wasn't an option unless you were working with a partner.

And yet, he had had just walked in here, completely buying anything this girl said.

"You never meant to move this house, did you?" Perry asked, balling his hands into fists.

"I must return to the home I love." Leanna said. She slowly looked down at him. "So I must take your life energy." She smiled, a vicious smile full of greed.

She suddenly reached out and grabbed at him. Perry felt something tugging on his chest. Something was leaving him. The ability to wake up was slowly slipping away from him.

"BOYS!" He shouted.

"Perry!" Came a slightly louder reply.

Perry kicked Leanna in the stomach and dashed down the hall.

 **...**

"Benedict, get a better auditory experience from above! See if you can tell where those voices are coming from."

A young bald eagle fluttered up to match Richard's speed as he ran. "What'll you give me?"

Richard didn't respond.

"You'd better not give me one of those pancake thingys from Paul Bunyan's pancake house." Benedict said as he floated to the ceiling.

"He reminds me of Perry." Phineas said sadly.

Ferb pulled him along.

"They're in the sleeping room." Benedict said.

"Bedroom." Richard corrected, quickly changing his direction and floating up a flight of stairs.

An insane peal of laughter sounded from the bedroom. " _I'M GOING HOMEE!_ "

Another voice, one Phineas had longed to hear for so long, sounded from underneath the floorboards.

"Perry." Phineas stopped.

Sneakers squirmed in Ferb's arms and stopped singing her ominous song.

"Come on." Richard said. "We have to get Leanna."

"I'm going down for Perry." Phineas ran down the stairs.

"You could get lost in here!" Richard yelled.

"I'll supervise them." Louis offered. He floated after Phineas.

"Cooking room." Benedict said, flying through Louis's body.

"Kitchen." Richard said.

"It's cooking room in the new language I just made up." Benedict said. "It's either gonna be called Richard the Lionheart or Richarditis. I haven't decided yet."

A grocer ghost with a nametag that said CHRIS on it looked nervous. "Richard, should we follow the kids? She's bound to show up wherever her next victim is."

"Oh, can it, Chrisalis." Benedict said. "She's in the Cooking Room. I already told you."

 **...**

Perry was sure that wherever his heart was, it was beating up a storm.

He was hiding behind the back of a stairwell in the basement, although he didn't think it would do much against Leanna.

He heard voices sweeping past him.

 _"…Follow the kids…"_

 _"Hairpins, hairpins…"_

It made him nervous.

Suddenly he heard Phineas's voice again. _"Perry!"_

"Phin… how are you here?" Perry whispered.

He didn't want to yell. Leanna would surely hear him.

 _"Chrysalis."_ Said another voice.

Great. He was trapped in the basement of a crazy chef, atop a mountain, surrounded by invisible people spouting random words.

He'd had stranger days.

"ENERGY! GIVE ME THE ENERGY!"

Leanna appeared directly in front of him, her eye twitching. Perry started and ran back up the stairs.

 **...**

"Where is he?" Phineas asked.

"Probably back home, in Gluum." Benedict said. "Must be nice, being back home. Wouldn't know how THAT feels."

"Gluum isn't Perry's home." Phineas said. "Danville is. We have to get him back."

"SKELETON!" Chris screeched, streaking past them.

"Oh, Chrisalis." Benedict said.

"Guys…" Ferb pointed.

A large skeleton was walking toward them, clutching a yellow ball that seemed to glow brighter and brighter.

"III'MMM ALLLMOOSSSTT HOOMMEE!" The skeleton said.

 **...**

Perry tried to break away from Leanna. He could hear Phineas very clearly now. Voices were everywhere.

He also heard Daly yelling, but he doubted Daly could catch Leanna now. She was almost in the real world.

 **...**

"We have to destroy her." Phineas said. "Ferb, do you have that laser we got from the laser museum?"

Ferb shook his head.

"Dang. What are we supposed to do?"

"We could panic." Benedict suggested.

"Or," Ferb said, picking up a small stone from the floor. "We could hit it with a rock."

He tossed the rock. It hit the skeleton right in the skull.

With a terrible yell, it fell to the ground and moved no more.

 **...**

The mansion vanished.

Perry was back on the mountain. He turned to look at Daly, who was holding a protesting Leanna back.

"GO!" Daly snapped.

Perry reached and pulled himself to the top of the mountain. He was aware of his presence in the real world. He was there. All he had to do was wake up.

He forced himself to open his eyes.


	11. Chapter 11

Perry was lying on his back. He was in a large, white room with a single window. The room was filled with teddy bears.

He felt sore, especially in his head and back.

He didn't understand why he was here. What had happened?

A slight memory slipped into his mind. The man holding him… asking him about Carl…

Perry hadn't told them he knew Carl.

Where was he? Was he here because he didn't tell them who Carl was?

"Carl?" Perry asked. His throat didn't produce a very prominent noise. It had forgotten how to chatter after so long.

He was very confused. He had no idea where he was, or why no one he knew was with him.

He repeated Carl's name over and over again to himself, louder and louder, until he was practically screaming.

He wanted to know where Carl was. Why he wasn't here. Why he wasn't coming.

"Woah, woah!"

Perry stopped. A man in a white coat was bending over him. "Calm down, little guy. It's okay. You're fine."

Perry tried to sit up.

"Lie down." The man said. "Do you know where you are?"

Perry looked around nervously. He couldn't tell where he was with all the teddy bears in the way.

He saw some kind of cord bandaged to his arm, and many other bandages covering his body. There was a large bruise on his left shoulder.

"You're going to be fine." The man said, slowly and calmly. "You were hit by a car and in a coma for two weeks, but you're going to be all right. Your caretakers are here. Do you want me to get them, or do you want a little more time to process?"

There was a boot on his nightstand. What kind of place had boots on nightstands?

"Do you understand me?" The man asked.

Perry nodded. It made him dizzy.

"I'll let your guardians know you're awake." The man said.

"Carl." Perry whimpered.

"Don't be nervous. You're fine."

"Where's Carl? I want Carl…"

The man didn't understand. He simply patted Perry's hand and left the room.

Perry slowly drifted off to sleep again. He was exhausted.

 **...**

"Perry?"

"Hmm?"

Perry opened his eyes. He saw blurry outlines of Phineas, Ferb, and Candace.

"Perry, you're awake!" Phineas said happily. "You're okay!"

Perry processed the words and immediately forgot about them. "Mmm-hmm." He closed his eyes.

"Sorry, you look tired. I'll talk quieter." Phineas said.

"Carl…"

"What did he say?" Candace asked.

"Carl." Phineas said.

"Who's Carl?" Candace asked.

"Mmm-hmm." Perry agreed.

"Perry, I'm sorry… I accidentally told Candace, but Ferb and I made her promise she wouldn't tell and Monogram may not find out and… we'll be careful, I promise."

Perry acknowledged the fact that Phineas was speaking to him. "Mmm-hmm."

"What's he saying?" Candace asked.

"He's just kind of agreeing with everything I say." Phineas said. "I don't think he understands what I'm saying right now. We're sorry, Perry. We'll let you get some rest."

"…Build?"

"Huh?" Phineas asked.

"What… did you build?"

"Oh… nothing, nothing these past two weeks."

"No… when… that time, when you built the thing… that time." Perry was struggling to find the words. He decided not to bother with them anymore.

"Mechanical elephants." Phineas said.

"…Hand?"

"Yeah, that's how I hurt my arm."

"Mmm-hmm." Perry didn't remember what he had just asked, but the answer seemed satisfactory.

"Get some sleep, Perry. We'll come and visit again tomorrow, okay?"

"With Carl?"

"Um… I think Carl's coming later."

"WHO THE HECK IS CARL?" Candace shouted.

Perry cringed. "Loud… bad… make it not loud."

"Candace, shh." Phineas said. "See you tomorrow, Perry."

"…Mmm-hmm."

 **...**

"You feeling okay, Agent P?"

Perry wished Monogram would stop stroking his head. It made it feel even worse.

"The doctors say you can go home tomorrow." Monogram said.

"And your owners will be on summer break then, so it works out perfectly." Carl said. "They've promised to keep you company and make sure you have everything you need to heal."

Perry didn't know why Carl had bothered to come visit. It wasn't as though they were close friends.

"And we've already started construction on a new closet to hold all your teddy bears." Monogram said. "And I brought a very special one." He reached in his pocket.

Perry growled. He wondered why people were giving him so many teddy bears. Was that the standard gift if you got hit by a car? Ice cream for falling down on the sidewalk, teddy bears for car incidents, and flowers for funerals?

"Here." Monogram handed Perry a small, well-loved teddy bear. His Snugglebear.

Perry smiled and hugged his Snugglebear to the bit of his chest that wasn't sore.

 **...**

"Perry's awake!" Peter cheered. "Now I can stop saving my money for the Save The Perrys fund and give it to the Save The Pandas fund instead!"

"YAY!" Pinky said.

"I'm gonna send him a teddy bear." Alan the alligator said. "That's the appropriate gift for someone who has been hit by a car, you know."

"Guys, we should give Perry a welcome back party when he gets back." Peter said.

"He'll hate that." Darren said.

"I know, but parties are fun for us, so we should do it." Peter held up an old O.W.C.A yearbook. "I'll get his baby picture from here and make it bigger so we can hang it on the wall."

Darren took the book and looked at it. "Aww, baby Perry is so cute."

Pinky flipped to the " _Q.W.C.A, Quotes Without A Cool Acronym_ " page and pointed. "And his quote fits him so well even now. 'No matter what, never trust those stupid movies about some girl going to find herself and growing as a person and then falling in love with that guy she hated at the beginning of the movie. Why? Because I hate those movies.'"

"That's not Perry's quote." Peter said. "This is Perry's. He was a baby then." He pointed at a quote at the bottom of the page.

 **"Marshmallows are white and leaves are green".**

"That's weird." Pinky said. "Who had that other quote, then?"

"Eages Benedict." Peter said. "Don't you remember him? Ellen the eagle's son? He died after he was in a coma for two days. He was a lot like Perry, sense-of-humor-wise. Ellen and Ernest were really sad."

Pinky looked over toward Ernest. Alan was telling Ernest the news about Perry. Ernest didn't seem very interested.

"Maybe that's why Ernest hates Perry so much." Pinky said slowly. "He reminds him of his dead nephew."

"Or maybe Perry just annoys him." Peter shrugged. "What baby picture of Perry should we use? The one of him eating mashed peas, the one of him clapping his paws, or the one of him throwing up mere seconds after eating mashed peas?"

 **...**

"I still don't get how banishing Leanna out of the entire Gluum universe brought you guys back, but I'm pleased." Daly said.

"Richard, old friend!" Said Mr. Brownie.  
"George Brownie!" Richard said happily.

"Guess things are back to normal again." Daly said. "That's nice."  
A pig fell from the sky and landed on Mr. Brownie's head.

"Oh, wonderful." Daly said sarcastically. "Now where did YOU come from?"

 **...**

"You TOLD her?!"

"Perry, it slipped out-"

"I'll rephrase: you told HER?"

"She made me so mad." Phineas looked ashamed. "Please, Perry, don't be angry."

"I could lose you guys for this."

"I know."

"Not just communication or memory-wise, Phin. They could flat-out take me AWAY from you. What are we gonna do?"

"Um… not tell Monogram?"

Perry sighed and looked up at the ceiling.

"Look, Perry… it could be helpful. If Ferb and I aren't around to look after you some days until you recover, Candace can…"

"Ha ha, Candace helping me, gosh, Phin, you're a riot. Let's get you a job as a comedian. Right now. Phone an agent."

"Candace can be helpful-" Phineas began.

"Phone's right there on the desk." Perry said.

"Ferb and I will make sure she gets you what you need." Phineas said. "And she'll keep your secret. We made her promise."

"The hilarity is too much to endure. I'm in stitches. Literally and figuratively, by the way. R.O.T.F.L."

"We'll take good care of you, though." Phineas said.

"I know you will, Phin." Perry tried to shift into a position that didn't hurt him. "Eck. I can't believe I have to stay lying down for a month. I'm gonna go stir-crazy."

"We'll read you books that have nothing to do with lying down."

"The New Nanny?"

"NO, Perry. Not that book again."

"Oh, sorry, I forgot. That book probably has quite a few chapters about lying down."

"OH, PERRY." Phineas covered his ears.

"…Because nannies have to put little kids to bed."

Phineas uncovered his ears.

"So that the kid's out of the way during other little shenanigans."

"PERRY!"

"What did I name that kid in the book again? Little Andy Bill or something? I can't remember."

"Perry, stop."

Perry grinned.

"At least you're feeling better." Phineas said. "You're back to your old self again. When I first came here, you looked so tired and helpless."

"Yep, back to my old self again." Perry said. "Hey, wanna read a book while we wait for Ferb to get back from the snack bar? I've got an old classic right here." He pulled a book out from a box Ferb had brought him and opened it up. "The New Nanny: Chapter One. Nancy The Nanny Meets Andy Bill's Father."

"NOOO!" Phineas covered his ears again.

"Just kidding, it's actually 'The Four Guys With Swords'." Perry said. "Let's see how long I can read before the painkillers kick in. Chapter One: The First Guy And His Sword…"


End file.
